Victoria (33) is dominatrix: ‘I take my customers seriously, everyone is different’
‘My name is mistress Victoria DeVill, I’m 33 years old and have been happily married for 2.5 years now. And yes, I’m a master to my husband as well. Five years ago, I worked as a stewardess at Schiphol, but I grew tired of the job. BDSM has always been my hobby, and what is better than making your hobby your work?’
What does the room you give your sessions in look like?
‘Every room is different. I give sessions in Doma The Hague and in SM-Studio Almere, where there are multiple rooms. Most rooms have a bed and an array of other furniture, such as: a cross, a cage, a buck, or a gynecology chair. Doma is located in a residential area, whereas SM-Studio Almere is located in an industrial area.’
Why a dominatrix?
‘BDSM has been my hobby for as long as I can remember. I love dominating and there are plenty of ways to make it into something fun and special. In addition, I love being able to contribute to fantasies and personal growth within BDSM. This job is simply made for me.’
Where does this fascination come from?
‘The fascination for BDSM doesn’t come from a particular place, I was born with it. Some people are naturally dominant, while others are naturally submissive (or a mix of both). It’s ingrained in who you are and sooner or later you’ll want to seek it out. Unless you were born without any predisposition in this area.’
Do your closest friends and family know about your job?
‘Yes, they do! I am very open about my profession. It would be terrible to have to hide things. All my friends and family know about my work. Because of their age, I did leave out some details to my grandparents.’
How did they react?
‘Very differently. Some were surprised, others immediately thought it suited me. Not everyone was aware of my interests. Ever since I started this job, BDSM has become a topic of conversation more often.’
What is the most common wish from clients?
‘That’s difficult to say. It varies from bondage to corporal punishment to foot fetishes. I, personally, like to work with rope, specifically shibari (Japanese rope bondage art). Every now and then I make art with needles. It depends on how far someone is willing to go and if that person is able to leave with bruises or whip marks. These things can be added or left out on request. Unfortunately, not everybody is able to admit their preferences to others.’
What does your target group look like?
‘That also varies enormously. The target group varies from young to old, people with little or a lot of experience, from people who visit regularly every 2 weeks to people who make it an annual occurrence. Even couples make regular appointments. Usually, I don’t have solo sessions with women, they mostly come with their partners. Sometimes, the woman prefers to watch, sometimes she participates, and sometimes the couple want to be handled together. The only common occurrence is an interest in BDSM. For some people, BDSM is an outlet to release stress. For example, some people release stress by meditating for an hour and others prefer to, quite literally, have the stress beaten out of their bodies.’
What does a first session look like?
‘Communication is key. When I have a new customer, I always start with a conversation. What does the client want? Do they have a preference for bondage or pain? What does the client absolutely not want? When we’ve discussed the do’s and don'ts, the client will take a shower. Afterwards, we start the session, which is always different, tailored to the clients wishes, limits, and experience, and what I feel like at the moment. BDSM is a journey of discovery. Sometimes someone requests something they want badly only to find out during the session that they can’t handle it or that their expectations are different from reality. Because of my knowledge and experience, I know when to change course to make the session enjoyable for both parties. A session with me is always done safely. Safe, Sane & Consensual.'
Do you decide on a safeword with your slaves?
‘If people request it, I indicate that they may use ‘mercy’. However, I can understand people flawlessly, so, in most cases, this is not necessary. Many people use a safe-word to try to influence the session, but I can quickly recognize this. Despite the fact that I usually know when someone is having a hard time, they can of course always just tell me.’
Do you have sex with your slaves?
‘No. Sexual activities with the client are possible, but I don’t allow them to touch me. If they behave well, at most, they may kiss my feet.’
‘I take my customers very seriously, everyone is different and their desires vary.’
What is the weirdest request you’ve ever had?
‘‘I take my customers very seriously, everyone is different and their desires vary. I don’t label sincere wishes as bizarre, no matter how unusual they may be.’
Do you have more customers ever since Fifty Shades of Grey was released?
‘That is difficult to say, I have mixed feelings about this movie. Yes, it did put BDSM on the map and made it a little more discussable. But, among other things, I really dislike how Christian treats Anastasia. The communication is lacking and he severely crosses her boundaries. Christian also buys his rope from the hardware store and many viewers copy this, but this is a gateway to accidents. Handling rope well, this includes finding good rope, is a skill in and of its own. This applies, of course, to several attributes.’
Do you have any common place tips for our readers?
‘BDSM is something you do together. Communication and boundaries are the most important things. Keep an eye on each other and pay attention to body language and other signals. Don’t overstep any boundaries! BDSM can be an outlet, but not for any pent-up anger or aggression. I always recommend going to a workshop to get the basic techniques under the rope. They also give a lot of tips on what you can do before, during, and after a session. I have enjoyed teaching professional workshops for many years. Don't be afraid to ask questions, I don't bite, well... not without reason!
And most importantly: Enjoy!'
